- One birth announcement and photo is really enough.
If you feel like speaking about the child split this rule into two parts. One post could be just text, for example, “ Baby John is here and mommy is doing fine J.” The next and final post about your new addition should be a picture. Select your picture wisely. I do not recommend the first week of birth, as some babies look a little alienish and need time to get their look together.
2. Do NOT tag friends when posting about the baby.
Your friends love you, they really do. However, they don’t necessarily want to be involved in every day of your life. It’s nothing personal. If your friends are single or have no kids it’s really a concept they don’t understand. After all, friendship is a two-way street.
3. SPARE us the gory details about the delivery process.
We get it, giving birth is beautiful and magical and a gift from heaven. The reality – it’s a messy process and no one wants to hear about it, not even you when the drugs wear off.
4. DO NOT constantly blame the baby if your post delivery body isn’t how you remembered.
Gaining weight is a part of the pregnancy process. We ALL know this. It is your responsibility to remain active or monitor your diet. Losing the baby weight may be a challenge for some, but remember it’s just that, a challenge. Discipline is key and updating us daily about how you hate your new body is never going to fix the problem.
5. Reframe from angry updates about your lack of sleep or frustration.
The thing is we just don’t feel sorry for you. In 2012, Motherhood is something you knowingly/willingly decide to do. Remind yourself of this every time you login and think about sharing your miserable night or day with us. Remember how you posted that paragraph about how beautiful the gift of Motherhood was a few weeks back? Enough said.
6. Less is more. T.M.I is T.M.I.
Be your own filter. I know it’s hard when you’re caught in the moment of this life-changing event but ask yourself, “Did I want to hear/see/read about this before I had my baby?” No. Soon the new baby haze will wear off and you’ll be back to normal. For now, say less.
7. DO NOT bash the father.
Things don’t always go as planned and people can be disappointing. However, it is never in good taste to bash even the most deserving deadbeat. We only tune into Maury when it’s a slow news day or when we’re sick and shut in. We do not want the foolery invading our timeline daily. That isn’t going to inspire him to be a better father and it isn’t making you look like an angelic, perfect mother.